


Subtle Idiosyncrasy

by m_k_ch



Category: Tennis no Oujisama | Prince of Tennis
Genre: Long Shot, M/M, Realization, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-04-05
Updated: 2016-04-05
Packaged: 2018-05-31 09:54:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,277
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6465715
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/m_k_ch/pseuds/m_k_ch
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Oshitari raised his eyebrow after Atobe looked at him with genuine confusion. “You’re oblivious to your own feelings?”</p><p>Atobe proceeded to open his mouth, but was interrupted and before he knew, he never managed even a squeak after Oshitari spoke.</p><p>“Don’t tell me, the great Atobe Keigo, doesn’t even realize he’s in love with Hiyoshi Wakashi.”</p>
            </blockquote>





	Subtle Idiosyncrasy

He was nothing to hundred players until he had approached him.

“I challenge you, Atobe-buchou.”

Quiet and airy.

The tone of his voice blended the around the silent locker room; Atobe couldn’t help but smirk.

“Challenge me, this late in the afternoon?”

True to his word, everyone left the court and most, if not all, went home already. Hiyoshi Wakashi, still breathing jaggedly, held his racket tightly as if practices were still to start.

Atobe still remembered his own words, fresh in his mind when he became captain of the tennis team. _“Challenge me if you wish to beat me. Feel free.”_

His smirk widened. Hiyoshi raised an eyebrow, and Atobe noticed a small twitch by his eye. _Impatient_ , he read. Perfect to his advantage.

-

The impatience wiped off Hiyoshi’s face when Atobe struck out a long battle for him, and instead was replaced with anger and exhaustion. Atobe only nearly laughed when he saw him, coughing his dry throat out as the street lights shone on him. While he knew it was nearing evening, he hadn’t realized how late it was.

So much for enjoying someone’s arrogance. 

He was soon to be forgotten with the hundreds that he defeated, but it wasn’t until he spoke up with a shaking voice, vibrating with determination.

“I _will_ defeat you someday, you know.”

Atobe’s smirk almost turned into a smile. Saying as if it was a fact than a dream-- he was impressed, and he was surprised that he was even impressed at all. First after he was impressed with Tezuka’s tennis. He covered it with a laugh that echoed around the courts. It didn’t seem to provoke a reaction from Hiyoshi’s face at all, but if he were Hiyoshi, he’d grit in anger and grip on the goal to defeat. Not that he hated himself, no. He’d love his own, arrogant self.

He wanted to see more.

“Say, Hiyoshi,” Atobe still held the loud voice after his laughter. “Train with me, if you want to be stronger, and take my place?”

His playful tone was still there. Atobe hadn’t enjoyed something so much. Either pass up an opportunity or show him what he was worth, taunting him like he would taunt what he had done to others.

But a small, flat “yes” was what he heard and soon then, Atobe had been training him.

His irregular schedule made these practices either short or long, continuous day by day or with a huge gap of one day to one week, since he was a man on the move. But he made sure these practices were always enough to prove to Hiyoshi that he wasn’t easily to be defeated.

-

Hiyoshi, as he saw, only observed, and asked only when he needed an answer. He was an easy student that did what he was told, but also did things to his own accord. He learned quickly, and it was as if he didn’t need Atobe at all.

But he still stayed for Hiyoshi, because it was his role a mentor.

Besides, he offered the chance, so who was he to abort it so quickly? It was up to Hiyoshi whether to leave it or continue it (but he showed no signs of leaving).

“A tip, Hiyoshi. When you serve, you should hold the racket like this..”

“Atobe-buchou, I get the feeling that somehow you’re only showing off.”

“Then you know how to grip the racket when you serve, then?”

Atobe was just teaching him, but he couldn’t help but play him. Hiyoshi, wrong from his impressions, was actually interesting and gave unexpected answers. It was like he wanted to pull out those answers from him, so he said things he wouldn’t.

Well, at least to him, anyway. And he was glad he had those words slip from his mouth when Hiyoshi had battled him.

Hiyoshi hadn’t said one word about the match, but he was sure it was still fresh in his mind and his top priority was defeating him.

“You still can’t defeat me in this state.”

“Someday.”

He let out a small, airy laugh. So factual. So down-to-earth.

It was the tiny moments that always made Atobe look forward to every session with Hiyoshi.

(Those were sentimental to him, like tiny lockets being kept inside him, stored away in a small part of his mind for him to always remember. It made every expected day meaningful to him.)

-

The play of the piano attracted Atobe to the music room, and there he saw Ootori play lightly. It relaxed him from the heat that added up to the stress, so he entered with a polite knock.

Ootori stopped playing and greeted Atobe, only Atobe waved his hand. “Please, continue playing. It’s a pain to hear your lovely music cut off.”

Ootori blushed and turned to the piano. “Th-thank you, Atobe-san.”

The music continued and Atobe closed his eyes, drowning himself in the flow. For a moment, Atobe had lost himself like he had fallen asleep, allowing himself to deepen further with every key press.

It was peaceful until he heard steps and when he turned, he saw Hiyoshi, who stopped a few feet away from him.

“What are you doing here?”

His presence alerted Ootori that he looked around, with the music slowly fading away as Ootori watched the scene.

“I am only here to hear Ootori’s playing. Is that not allowed?”

Hiyoshi rolled his eyes and brushed past him, entering the music room. “Whatever.”

Atobe almost wanted to dart his eyes. If it wasn’t for his deadpan voice that lacked any form of emotion that disrespect was indecipherable, he would’ve punished him with laps later.

Soon Ootori and Hiyoshi were talking-- no, Ootori was scolding him quietly enough that Atobe could only make out the words “rude”, “Atobe-san”, and “be nice”. Atobe watched as Hiyoshi didn’t say anything but instead sat down by the piano and pulled out a book.

“I shall be going, Ootori, Hiyoshi.”

Ootori waved a goodbye and Hiyoshi only scoffed.

Atobe walked down the halls grinning and silently laughing to himself.

-

“I didn’t know Hiyoshi went to the music room often.”

“He _is_ a quiet person. He always has that book around.”

“Maybe he does other more things with Ootori than listen to him play the piano.”

Just then, Oshitari smirked and looked at Atobe. Atobe’s self-control almost disappeared.

“I’m going to make sure you’re bankrupt when you get home, Oshitari.”

-

“Why do you go to the music room?”

Hiyoshi stopped weighing his racket and paused before he looked at Atobe.

“I-I’m sorry..?”

“You heard me, Hiyoshi.”

Hiyoshi sighed and closed his eyes. “Because it’s quiet.”

“And?”

“I like hearing Choutarou play.”

It got silent, then Atobe went to serve.

-

His team didn’t know, but Atobe never showed that he cared. But it was very subtle on how he showed it.

-

"Where are you going, Hiyoshi?"  
  
It was pretty much late at night, and it confused Atobe on why Hiyoshi could be going somewhere else. "Go home and rest."  
  
Hiyoshi looked at him with the same confused look. "I was only going to the convenience store to buy something to drink. How is it any of your business.?"  
  
"I'm your captain. I know my team must be in top shape. Even with tons of practice, every player must rest after practice." Atobe said, suddenly feeling his face flush up in embarrassment. He was right; who was he to join other people's business? But he hid his mistake through a raised eyebrow.  
  
Hiyoshi clicked his tongue and carried his bag, back facing Atobe. "Don't care for me. Besides, I'm going home after it anyway."  
  
Atobe slowly nodded to no one, and before Hiyoshi left, "Atobe-buchou.. do you want to..." Atobe looked at him for him to continue, but he dropped his words instead. He shook his head and audibly swallowed. "Never mind."  
  
"Hiyoshi--"  
  
"I said never mind!" Hiyoshi raised his voice, and relaxed his shoulders before shouting any further.  
  
Atobe's embarrassment turned into more confusion, and then turned into.. anger. _Why couldn't he just say anything?_  
  
He opened his mouth to spit back, but Hiyoshi had sprinted away and left Atobe.  
  
Atobe's fumes died down. The words at the back of his throat was swallowed when Hiyoshi left, leaving an uncomfortable churn in his stomach. He sighed and went to fix his things instead, inevitably ignoring the discomfort of his curiosity.  
  
"It's not something to be agitated about," Atobe said to himself.  
  
But he couldn't push it away, even after he had closed down the premises and went to his own home. He hoped the next day the discomfort would have gone far, far away, never to be felt again.

-

Days had gone by and trainings were met, but Atobe still wondered what Hiyoshi could’ve asked him that day.

Deciphering from where he was going and his tone of voice, he wondered if Hiyoshi wanted to come with him to the store.

(And Atobe, for a while, was _offended._ Buying in a convenience store? No, he knew he must always have everything in top quality!

...So why would Hiyoshi want to come with him?)

“Hiyoshi,” Atobe called, wiping his sweat and checking his phone by the bench. “What were you going to ask me again a  few days ago?”

There was silence. He looked up then Atobe saw Hiyoshi’s face red, and mouth moving, failing to pull out the words that he was trying to say.

“I--”

“Yes?”

“I was just..”

His words echoed as the crickets chirped around them. Then, shakily and silently, Hiyoshi stumbled his words quickly.

“..asking if you wanted to-- _wanted anything!_ ”

Hiyoshi’s eyes dug into Atobe’s, telling him that what he was saying was true and seemed to want to _fight_ him if he asked anything.

Atobe knew well what his real answer was.

But his breaths stopped short and suddenly his throat was stuck.

(Why was it hard to breathe?)

Atobe, instead, chuckled. “I appreciate your sentiments, Hiyoshi, but I only aim for the best quality I can find!” He turned and went to his own place in the court, ignoring the burning sensation he felt crawling up his neck.

Hiyoshi groaned and his face became redder. “I-I know. That’s why I never bothered.”

Atobe’s chuckles died out as his face was outlined with a smile.

He played with a constricting feeling in his chest.

-

As the matches with Seigaku were nearing, he noticed Hiyoshi was more agitated.

No, he wasn’t. He was excited.

He couldn’t help himself, too, to be excited.

After the striking loss with Fudomine, the anger left of it gave a whole change of players in the team, and everyone seemed to have more power in the courts. The squeaking of the shoes and sounds of bouncing tennis balls were marked visibly as the tournaments slowly jittered the whole school up. Atobe felt more support from the students, more shaky breaths, more hours put into training.

The qualified team had been working harder than most, but he also saw Hiyoshi slowly drifting away from everyone and practiced as much as them. His eyes would always hover to him, but he knew that they will win.

-

It was a dramatic show of power unending determination. Tezuka had beyond strained his arm for the sake of his team, and Atobe gave him the honor he deserved.

The heightened excitement trembled when the fight between Hiyoshi and Echizen was announced, in place of the equal scores that needed to be shook.

Hiyoshi’s efforts were not in vain.

He lost.

But it was never in vain.

Atobe could say he wasn’t surprised when he was defeated; he had known Echizen, an impossible, stoic, and annoying child who managed to struggle his way to crushing everyone in his way. Still, it left pain in everyone from the heart crushing defeat, because they had lost to Fudomine, and Seigaku wasn’t supposed to add to the anger but should add pride and boasting privileges. Except it didn’t, but was it Hiyoshi’s fault they lost?

(It was, technically, but he didn’t feel any discontent for him. And it was a mismatch.)

What really _did_ surprise Atobe, was that Hiyoshi stood still in the courts; silent, tears dripping from his eyes, and the next thing he knew, the team was there and his own feet were leading him to where he stood.

He wanted so badly to touch him.

Shishido’s arms had grabbed Hiyoshi before his knees buckled and fell. Hiyoshi’s arms covered his face, wiping his tears off because of his disappointment in himself.

The team started to comfort him, saying small words that didn’t do enough to heal the damage that was already done. Atobe should’ve said something, but instead he wanted to… touch him.

He wanted to shake him out of it, yell at him, tell him to stop it because he shouldn’t have thought of anything that made him break down in the middle of the courts.

He reached for his shoulder and gripped it lightly.

Hiyoshi looked up, teeth clenched and with much effort to hide himself from his shame. Atobe’s eyes hardened with care, and he hoped that Hiyoshi got his message.

Coach Sakaki told it to Hiyoshi for him, that he should never be ashamed, because it was Hyotei that should lead Hyotei.  Sakaki’s words have lifted Hiyoshi’s reverie, and everyone’s comforting efforts. They’ve lead the student body out with the cheers and chants to fill the gaping hole left by the defeat. Hiyoshi’s eyes never moved away from Atobe’s before he left and went with the team, quietly walking while everyone cheered for him, too.

Atobe thought his look and touch were enough, but he felt the smallest feeling of _regret_ that he still hadn’t done enough

-

Weeks have passed and everything in the club was done as usual, except the atmosphere toughened like steel barriers and Atobe couldn’t feel more proud for what he’s had.

Especially Hiyoshi.

He always found himself going over Hiyoshi, looking for him just to look at him. He was captain, of course he was going to look over his team.

Hiyoshi caught his eyes and immediately walked over to him, Atobe’s eyebrows raised in question and even amusement.

“Practice.”

And his stoic face went back to his own set of priorities.

He sensed Oshitari walk to him with his silent footsteps and piercing eyes. “What was that about, Atobe?” He drawled, dragging his hard words smoothly.

Atobe rubbed his fingertips and looked at Oshitari, face pulling into a mocking pout.

“You seem demeaning, Oshitari. Hiyoshi only wanted to go for his usual training with me.”

Oshitari’s hooded eyes gave away nothing except his raised brows for the element of surprise. “Ho~? Hiyoshi-kun having a secret training with the all-so-great Atobe Keigo?” Oshitari chuckled with a tease. “How disappointing it was when he lost to Echizen, when he had been training with Atobe all this time.”

Atobe had always known Oshitari as playful, flirty, and mocking, but almost never always true to what he says. A mysterious man.

He would’ve took that into account, but instead he felt annoyance. Clenching his fist in a small fit of rage, Atobe slowly breathed out and squinted at the smirking, teasing teammate. “Oshitari,” Atobe replied, voice low, almost as if it was a warning. “I believe I have been training Hiyoshi in top quality, and his defeat with Echizen would not stop him, nor hold him back.” Atobe said slowly, the threat in his voice apparent. “It would increase his potential, so I very, _strongly,_ disagree with you.”

He felt as if he said those words too quickly like in a shutter, but the long stare of Oshitari said otherwise.

“Are you threatening me, Atobe?” Oshitari cocked his head. “You might already be thinking of ways to ruin my life. What an interesting display of character.”

Atobe smirked back at him. He would ever so proudly show that character, because people should know what he is, and what he is capable of.

Even in front of the cunning Oshitari.

(In which, he soon felt a pang of regret, because it was _Oshitari,_ but his mistakes wouldn’t hold him back.)

-

In his practice with Hiyoshi, his silence was… stiffer.

“You know what happened, Hiyoshi.” Atobe said, bouncing the ball. “You know it’s not going to hold you back.”

“Of course.” Hiyoshi struggled to strain his words out, anticipating Atobe’s serve with a hardened face.

Atobe stopped bouncing the ball and Hiyoshi stood straight in confusion. Atobe walked over him, keeping track of his eyes. He stood still while Hiyoshi only had a visible question in his face, before Atobe poked his forehead and Hiyoshi stumbled back, an annoyed look replacing his questioning look.

Atobe put his hand on his waist while Hiyoshi stammered. “Wh-what was that about?”

“If you know very well what happened, then snap out of it.”

Hiyoshi’s face scrunched up in a frown, making his lip twitch, as if in disgust. “Try it, Atobe-buchou, losing to your whole team, and taking away the opportunity and it was your fault. Losing and everyone had their eyes on you. But you have never felt it, am I right?”

Atobe’s throat went dry with the same radiating irritation, if not anger, as Hiyoshi. He knew very well of the ugly feeling, and never bothered to have it felt again.

But he didn’t burst out. His past was well out of the topic. He was only trying to make Hiyoshi move on from his failures.

“I can empathize, Hiyoshi. You just never spoke up.” He furrowed his brows and looked intensely in his eyes. “How do you expect yourself to recover when you always distance yourself from us?”

Hiyoshi fell silent for a moment, like he was a stubborn, scolded child, still staring back into Atobe in annoyance. “Fine, jerk.” Then he snickered, “How unfitting, you actually care.”

Atobe felt the heat in his cheeks rise and turned away quickly, muffling his blush with a laugh. “Of course I do, I’m your captain!”

Atobe’s mind whirled with scenarios and responses. Mostly, people would thank him, blush, even push him away in fluster. He was pretty sure certain people would say the same response, like Shishido or Oshitari. Well, he is a normal person with really high self-esteem. High self-esteem is not out of the ordinary.

(He’d like to believe that.)

“Hiyoshi.”

Hiyoshi, Atobe heard, stopped his snickering. “Open up more. That should really help you.”

Atobe looked back and he saw Hiyoshi looking down the ground, contemplating for a second before he went back to his stance and prepared for Atobe’s serve.

-

Back at his own home, Atobe silently sipped tea with Kabaji, watching the stars outside of his garden. Tired, yes, but he always appreciated the stars for a nice relaxation when he needed one.

“Kabaji.”

Kabaji looked at him silently.

“Is your hand okay now?”

Kabaji nodded with a small, whispered “yes,” and Atobe smiled. He was glad for his honesty.

He stood up and before he left to his own room, he said, without any turn or hesitation, “Make sure your crowd is okay.”

Atobe made sure that Kabaji knew who he was talking about.

-

“Hyotei! Hyotei!” Atobe heard vaguely. The chant was far away, but shook strong.

He saw arms in the air, and more cheers and wide mouths into display. People were calling out for his name, and the crowd still roared. There were opposing teams that shook hands yet the faces blurrily lined with disappointment.

He faced the faceless people that jumped on each other, smirking at their image. He looked to the side and he saw a wisp of brown hair that looked down. He reached out to him and the touches collided strongly--

Atobe awoke with the sudden blink of his eyes, adjusting until he saw that the time was 2 A.M. He breathed shakily and went back to sleep.

-

He gritted his teeth at the fact that they were going to Nationals by pure luck. While others cheered, some had scoffed at the thought of going in barely instead of full force.

The practices with Hiyoshi seemed to have doubled, but Atobe didn’t complain. He gladly took all of his requests, and he surely noticed his improvements.

The way his arms moved, his legs run and his body flex. His form was more relaxed and Atobe was impressed at the sudden prowess he had, and he gave himself a small pat at the back when he smiled at the thought that he contributed to these improvements.

The street lights shone brighter than the moonlight, and only when Atobe checked his watch that he realized they’d been practicing for hours. More than he expected.

He didn’t stop Hiyoshi until he showed that he exhausted himself out.

-

 

After their shower, it was a quiet arrangement in the locker room. No words spoken, just packing their belongings and their wet hairs clinging on their necks. Hiyoshi’s, rather. Hiyoshi’s wet hair clinging on his neck, dripping down his collar and leaving it wet, marking his skin translucent. His shirt moist from his lack of drying, his sleeves wet and on his defined arms--

 

Atobe looked away and packed up his things, quickly bidding Hiyoshi an unheard goodbye.

-

Atobe, he decided, Hiyoshi wasn’t like any other person he’d met. He seemed so general. Your typical arrogant, quiet type no one bothered to mess with.

Well, not really. That was what he first thought of him before he challenged him. Before he initiated he trained with him.

Which was irregular. Indefinite times of meeting and somehow he knew more of Hiyoshi despite the fact that he kept silent until he was spoken to.

He was interested in him. It was nothing special. He’s interested in people who show potential. He became a mentor to him because he was the one who wanted to be one. And mentors only teach.

-

Atobe smacked him at the back of his head and Hiyoshi slapped his hand back.

“What the hell?”

“If you’re struggling, at least tell me, Hiyoshi. There’s no use holding back when I’m right in front of you.”

Hiyoshi rolled his eyes and went back to practice.

-

Most expected, most were surprised.

It was no surprise that Seigaku showed a lot of strength and potential.

Most expected Hyotei to win, roughly beating their opponents down

Losing was a feeling they had felt before, of course. Yet, this was one feeling that settled in painfully. Disappointment, loss, and even dramatic tragedy. It was so close and yet Seigaku managed to take the place away from them.  
  
For Atobe, this was a loss that washed over him, feeling an entirely different kind of pain and negativity. Because it was his chance to take the title, but it slipped from his fingers and it was roughly snatched away from them. He was supposed to be their savior, but he failed and it was gone.  
  
Atobe could only hear the silence around him, as if the cheers of Seigaku were nothing to him. It felt like he was in another world. _Maybe it's my fatigue._  
  
And his fatigue was weighing him down. " _The king has fallen_ ," he heard.  
  
He was still in his place, until suddenly the team went to his side of the court and only then he realized that Echizen had the razor to shave his hair for the inevitable bet they placed on each other.  
  
That was nothing, so Atobe took the razor from Echizen and shaved his own hair as his pride. He "shaved away a striking part of himself" as he would say it.  
  
Then Atobe went to cheer for his own team. He couldn't remember his words, but all he heard from his own voice was loss, honor, and Hyotei.  
  
Atobe saw the tennis club of his own put their arms up and roared with the chant, overpowering Seigaku's. His own team did the same, now leading the whole club to show Seigaku that the loss of the match won't be the loss of Hyotei's power.  
  
Atobe was about to join in to lead with them, but his eyes laid on the one that wasn't part of the cheers.  
  
"Hiyoshi, what are you standing still for?" Atobe's voice was low, raspy from the erratic breaths he had taken from the long match.  
  
Hiyoshi merely looked at him, but Atobe couldn't decipher what those eyes meant. His brows were furrowed, and his face was formed in the tiniest of scowls. Was he annoyed at Atobe's shaved hair? Was he angered by the loss? Was he disgusted by the performance Atobe did in his match with Echizen?  
  
Everyone around them started to disperse slowly from the courts, and Hiyoshi slowly walked towards him, stiff and tense. The frown on his face didn't disappear as he jabbed Atobe's chest with his finger.  
  
Atobe stumbled in surprise when Hiyoshi whispered shakily, "Don't hide it. Don't hide that anger inside of you when you lost to that brat."  
  
Atobe's chest constricted with a dull ache.  
  
(He'd like to believe it was from Hiyoshi's jabbing hand.)  
  
"I should be leading the team now, Hiyoshi. Now's not the time to cry over a loss."  
  
Atobe's own voice shook. His stomach churned and he didn't know why. Was it the anger Hiyoshi was speaking of?  
  
He did feel the anger, the absolute disappointment he felt to himself after losing the one chance they had to win the Nationals they dreamed of. He really did…

Atobe walked away, always ignoring what he felt and started to cheer with his tennis team.  
  
He looked back again, seeing Hiyoshi slowly following him back with his head down.  
  
He swallowed but continued to chant for Hyotei, because he still needed to pull up his pride. 

-

“Don’t you trust us, Atobe-buchou?”

The locker rooms silenced around Atobe. The sounds stopped and the talks died down, only to look at Hiyoshi from the sudden question he blurted out.

They had just lost the Nationals , and the atmosphere turned dimmer with the sudden quietness.

“Hiyoshi-kun..” Ootori softly called him out, the sadness and nervousness evident in his voice.

“All you do is hide how you feel. Isn’t that unhealthy?” Hiyoshi said. His voice was hard, and all Atobe could do was watch him with his mouth agape. “Isn’t that what you said to me?”

“Hiyoshi--”

“Didn’t you tell me to open up more? Didn’t you tell me to stop shutting myself out from the team?” Hiyoshi’s voice was louder now, and everyone around him, even Atobe, had their eyes wide at his sudden outburst. “You can’t just eat your words and chew it out, hypocrite!”

It was like they had all stumbled back, but his words had Atobe pushed and punched.

“You felt it, right? Losing to your team when you knew only had one chance left? Don’t hide how you felt so _bad_!”

“You don’t understand, Hiyoshi--”

“Of course I understand! I lost to Echizen, don’t act as if that didn’t happen. But this isn’t about me, I’m talking about you.”

“Oi, Wakashi,” But Shishido’s words hadn’t reached out to Hiyoshi. He didn’t look back. Reaching out didn’t work.

“Have you forgotten, Atobe?” Hiyoshi spat his words out, hard and unforgiving; Atobe couldn’t say anything. “You told me my efforts were never in vain. I want you to believe that with yourself, too…”

The rest of it died down from his throat, now looking down with his face formed in a scowl.

“I haven’t forgotten.” Atobe spat back with equal intensity. “I know what happened, Hiyoshi. It’s impossible that we share the same feelings, so don’t act as if you empathize with me completely.”

“You didn’t understand mine back then because you barely lost at anything!”

“I know how you feel!” Atobe shouted, “I have felt it many times before, so don’t you dare say that I haven’t experienced what everyone else has done!”

The room felt smaller, the shout being the one that tensed up each of their shoulders. Atobe wanted to yell at Hiyoshi more that he was _wrong,_ because who was he to say such things to him? He had known all what the team has felt, and Hiyoshi had the audacity to say that? He wanted to grab him and shake him and prove him he was wrong, he wanted to get angry at his accusations, he wanted to… He wanted to feel anger. He wanted that anger because it was the right way to feel.

He only felt pain and pity and… the ache for reassurance.

_What?_

Oshitari broke the silence, still maintaining the tense atmosphere as his tone wasn’t in any form comforting. “What do you want to say, Hiyoshi-kun?”

Atobe looked at Oshitari and at the same time, Hiyoshi’s glare pierced him. “I don’t want him acting so undignified.”

Hiyoshi looked away and went to fix his own belongings, with the other teammates following the suite and letting the whole situation pass.

Atobe fell silent but no one pointed it out. He slowly went back to his own business, letting all the words wash over him.

They left the locker rooms one by one, while Atobe still tended to his own work.

“Ootori-kun, you should go home by now.”

“I know that Oshitari-senpai. I’m still fixing my stuff.”

“Shishido won’t mind?”

Atobe’s eyes trailed over them, seeing the small shake of Ootori’s head. The whole situation was surreal, and Atobe’s head weighed lightly. There was no ache, but rather a foggy feeling.

Oshitari left and Atobe questioned why Ootori still stayed. “What is it, Ootori? Do you want anything?”

Ootori only faced his locker, his lips in a small smile. “No, but I’m just shocked that Hiyoshi-kun would be angry like that. He had done it a few times, but it’s surprising that he would do that to you.”

His face formed to a full smile now, like it was something to be proud of. Atobe confusingly cocked his head. “What do you mean?”

“Please don’t misunderstand him, Atobe-san. Despite him, he’s actually fragile. I’ve seen it before.” Ootori giggled. “But please don’t tell him I said this to you.”

Atobe only pushed. “Just tell me what you want to say.”

Ootori closed his locker and faced him. “Seems like Hiyoshi-kun really cares about you. He’s only scolded me back then, but for him to do that to you, you might mean a lot to him.”

Ootori bowed his head and left as a goodbye.

-

Atobe noticed Hiyoshi just silently passing, as if he was just another team member. He wasn’t technically ignoring him or avoiding him, but his answers were short and Atobe felt like he was drifting far, far away.

“Are you avoiding me, Hiyoshi?”

Hiyoshi stopped on his tracks and faced Atobe, letting his words echo in the empty hallway.

He scrunched his brows before replying curtly. “I’m not.”

“Then why do you seem like you're throwing a tantrum at me?”

Hiyoshi stuttered, blushing red and suddenly it was easier to breathe.

“I--I’m not throwing a tantrum!” Hiyoshi clicked his tongue. “What do you want?”

“I’m only curious at your sudden outburst. It didn’t seem like you’re the type who would do it.”

Hiyoshi sighed. “Do you really think I’m the type that would just ignore everything?”

Atobe crossed his arms. “I am just surprised, Hiyoshi, of how you delivered it.”

Hiyoshi huffed and breathed slowly, and Atobe felt his impending anger. “You know how much I hated it? Seeing you look so pitiful and there’s nothing I can do about it?”

Atobe’s eyes hardened at the offense. “Pitiful? I hate being pitied. How could say that?

“Then don’t act like it. At least let me in if you hate being seen as such.”

“You’re acting so noble, Hiyoshi.”

With Atobe’s last words, Hiyoshi stepped closer like he was about to jab him on the chest again, but kept a distance that was so close.

_Yet he’s so far._

“I would’ve thanked you.” His breaths hit Atobe’s mouth with a shaking voice. “I would’ve done so much the same, because you’ve offered me so much and I want to repay you with such.

“But you don’t want me to do that, am I right, Atobe-buchou?”

He looked at his eyes. Every word felt like searing hot iron pressed to his skin, because it was true. And yet he felt so pained, because he wanted to reach to him and grasp him. Why was he pained?

“I wanted to tell you that for so long. Because you were the source of my ambitions, and it all felt like you were throwing it away.”

Hiyoshi deflated and Atobe exhaled from so much of what he was holding in.

“I respect you. I’ve always seen how much you’ve worked hard. It surprised me you’d even practice with me and never let me go.”

 _You wanted it, so I don’t want to stop it._ Atobe wanted to say. _But it was you. I don’t find myself letting it go._

“You didn’t have to win the Nationals!” Hiyoshi’s voice was quiet, but high pitched in intensity. “You didn’t have to win to be the person people love! If you would’ve let me in, I would’ve told you I loved and appreciated you! I would’ve beat all the people who said so!

“But now, I already did. Because I don’t ever want seeing you so helpless.”

Atobe only watched him walk away slowly before turning his back at him, leaving him speechless with his words hanging in the air.

-

Most roses were either the passionate, striking red, or the pure, quiet white. The contrast of it felt like it was a battle of beauty, but had calmed each other down when set together.

Hiyoshi.. Hiyoshi was a red rose. Burning, deep reds that striked with fire and darkness.

Yet the quiet whites mixed in with the icy aura it left. Burning, yet he froze his way with the stabbing whites.

-

“Is everything okay with Hiyoshi now?”

Oshitari snapped him from his stares at the players and he looked at him, unsurprised.

“Shouldn’t you be at practice, Oshitari? You can’t leave your teammates hanging.”

Oshitari ignored his question and patted his sweaty face as a sign to Atobe, to which Atobe took notice of despite the disrespect of him, because no one answers to Atobe like that.

“I asked you first, Atobe.”

Atobe sighed. “I think it is. Well, he already confronted me, so I could well say he had mended our connections.” _Probably._ “ And would you please stop being so smug?”

“Oh, I can.” Oshitari laughed. “I’ve just been wondering why it’s always Hiyoshi’s spot that you’re around.”

Atobe Keigo stared at him confusingly before looking around the courts and did realize, Hiyoshi was there, practicing with a clubmate.

For the first time, Atobe did not have a proper answer.

“It’s pure coincidence.” He said quickly.

Oshitari chuckled deeply like Atobe was wrong.

(Well, yes, Atobe makes mistakes, but he always knew what his mistakes were.)

Oshitari raised his eyebrow after Atobe looked at him with genuine confusion. “You’re oblivious to your own feelings?”

Atobe proceeded to open his mouth, but was interrupted and before he knew, he never managed even a squeak after Oshitari spoke.

“Don’t tell me, the great Atobe Keigo, doesn’t even realize he’s in love with Hiyoshi Wakashi.”

The sounds around the court silenced even with the visible movements.

He only looked at Oshitari, scanning him of his face, while Oshitari only smirked.

He blinked at him and exhaled the breath he held out for so long while staring. Oshitari let out a small hum as if to snap Atobe from his thoughts.

“What on earth are you talking about?” Atobe stammered. “I am merely his mentor and his captain.”

Oshitari laughed and pushed up his glasses. “You’re so humble to say that for yourself. See you again, later.” He looked back to the courts and spotted Hiyoshi, wiping his forehead (and somehow, Atobe got mesmerized.)

“Good luck, Atobe.” He winked.

Atobe stood on his place, dazed.

-

“Atobe-san."

Atobe turned to the panting breaths of Ootori, who ran down the hallway just to keep up with him.

“Breath, Ootori.” Atobe walked towards him and leaned on his side. “What is it?”

“Hiyoshi will have his practice with you later.”

Atobe hummed in question. “Why would he tell you to go after me when he could just say it to me directly?”

“He didn’t.” Ootori stood straight and beamed a smile back at him.

“ _What_?”

“He was just talking about it when I was with him, but I saw you so I grabbed the chance.” Ootori laughed shakily. “I think he was even calling my name to stop me.”

Atobe only frustratingly looked at him. “You didn’t have to chase me. Hiyoshi could just tell it to me later.”

But Ootori shook his head and spat his words out in the same frustrated tone. “Haven’t you realized it, Atobe-san? I wouldn’t _really_ run to you just to tell you about this.”

“Then say it, boy! I don’t have time for mind games.”

“Choutarou!”

Ootori looked back and Hiyoshi was walked towards him, his face angry. This triggered a nervous stammer from Ootori.

“I don’t have time, too, but it’s best if you or Hiyoshi-kun told it.”

_Told what?_

Ootori bowed before running back to Hiyoshi. “Hiyoshi-kun is very shy, but I think you could pull out his feelings. Don’t hurt him, okay?”

He was gone the second he said them. Hiyoshi and Ootori were walking far away, before Atobe noticed Hiyoshi looking back.

He felt his face burn up and his mind whirled.

_Oh._

_-_

There were many things Atobe took note of Hiyoshi.

Other than tennis, he was also good at using the Japanese abacus. His favorite subject was Math, and he scores bad with Music, interconnecting with his dislike for karaoke.

He noticed he always carried a mysterious book around, but he also noticed that he carried tissues with him. He always wiped his hands after every break of playing.

He was very quiet, but always said the things he wants to say directly, no matter how dense he is with his offense. He tends to fight people a lot when they irritate him, but he also pulls a person down to tell them how ridiculous they are so they couldn’t hurt themselves further.

Hiyoshi also cared a lot, in the most subtle way possible. Atobe could say he was the same.

-

“Am I right or am I right?”

“Do you want me to humiliate you in front of every possible love interest that you have?”

“Oh Atobe, don’t be so evil. Just be happy. I think Hiyoshi reciprocates.”

Atobe raised his brow at him. “Now, who are you to say that?”

Oshitari subtly faced the courts with Ootori and Shishido. “I have my sources.”

Atobe smirked. “Ootori’s starting to get on my nerves.”

Mukahi called Oshitari and yelled something about practice and “beating Seigaku’s ass to the ground”.

Oshitari only patted his shoulder before walking away. “Watch him. He’s sly, and he’s dangerous.”

-

Atobe couldn’t help as his heart skipped a beat.

All he could do while doing warm ups was look at him. Look at Hiyoshi and he felt the thousands of stars dancing above them as they slowly appear from the sky.

He wanted to snap from his dreamy reverie, but he couldn’t as he forgot every feeling of the hit and serve from his racket. He felt like it was quiet even with the gasps and pants and shouting of encouragements.

It wasn’t until Hiyoshi stopped moving and Atobe’s sneakers squeaked with a stop. Hiyoshi walked to the bench, settling his racket down and getting a towel, his words muffled as we wiped his face with it. “You’re not yourself.”

“Ah,” Atobe closed his eyes and shrugged. “The Nationals still left a bitter mark, then.”

But Hiyoshi shook his head lazily, his breaths fast with his words airy. “No. That’s not it.”

Atobe only looked at him with the same fast breaths. “Then what do you think is it?”

“I’ve been with you long enough to see through you.”

Atobe smirked. _Oh?_

“I feel flattered you’d take the time to watch me to know me well enough, Hiyoshi.”

Hiyoshi blushed and Atobe walked to the center if the court, leaning slightly on the net with a smile threatening to creep up on his face. It was a welcoming view, just seeing him. Oshitari was right, and he felt a bitter taste on his tongue that it was Oshitari who realized Atobe’s feelings first before Atobe. Even Ootori realized it first. From Hiyoshi _and_ Atobe

But he was right. He was looking at him and Atobe was smiling at him.

“Wh-what are you looking at?”

“I’ve also thought of that myself, too.”

Hiyoshi stuttered his words and blushed deeper, like it was blending in with the dark surroundings. Atobe walked over the net and approached Hiyoshi, who was still in his place while watching him with the softening eyes. The glare disappear and he looked defenseless, with his face red yet faltered.

Atobe settled his racket on the bench and inched closer to Hiyoshi, who only looked away.

“I’ve thought about what you’ve said to me. You could say I was quite giddy after the whole ordeal.”

Hiyoshi only moved his mouth so slightly. “I’m staying true to my words.”

“Thank you.”

Hiyoshi’s head turned to him in a flash, his eyes wide in a small surprise.

He was supposed to hold back, but not after seeing his eyes. It was so easy to read him, but Atobe was oblivious to his own. Atobe suddenly laughed and Hiyoshi scowled with a “tch” but he never inched away from him. He never moved even when Atobe raised his hand to his cheek, and Atobe felt him lean ever so slightly.

The formation of the scowl soon disappeared as he looked down from Atobe’s eyes, and only then Atobe’s other hand cupped his other cheek, like a desperate call. “Look at me, Hiyoshi.”

Hiyoshi looked at him and suddenly Atobe felt him grab his shirt, his fist clenching and unclenching.

Soon every encounter he had with Hiyoshi splashed him like a wave, and all he could think of was Hiyoshi and he was _there_ , in front of him, and he was holding him and he wasn’t falling away.

He leaned his forehead on Hiyoshi’s, their eyes looking into each other and suddenly he was drowning in them, and all Atobe could think of was _Hiyoshi._

He felt Hiyoshi’s hands slide on his back, and suddenly his lips met his.

It was still, frozen, until they broke apart and Hiyoshi was redder than he had seen him. Atobe laughed while he still leaned on him, his arms wrapping around Hiyoshi and everything around them silenced.

“I’ve wanted to do that for a long time now.” Hiyoshi whispered, his eyes down on Atobe’s lips. Atobe did the same, wanting the same taste back again, but it was so quiet and _perfect_ he couldn’t move.

“I’ve thought about you so much.” Atobe quietly answered back. “I’ve seen you in my dreams and I didn’t know how much I wanted you until now.”

Hiyoshi smiled and Atobe almost fell, gripping him harder and completely forgetting the courts beside them.

“Kiss me again.”

The stars danced on Hiyoshi’s eyes and Atobe wanted to say he was _beautiful_.

His words were drowned when the stars disappeared and all he felt was Hiyoshi.

**Author's Note:**

> alright this is just a fic with bits of canon content with my own plot. also atobe was really hard to write lmao.
> 
> i had some inspiration from some atohiyo talk with tumblr user umihoshi (check them out!)
> 
> criticism is very much appreciated! my tumblr is atohiyo


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